“Mom, He’s Looking At Me!”

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Being a mom is so fun! I remember when my kids used to sit around the breakfast table eating and suddenly one of the girls would get upset because one of the boys was looking at her. (I had five kids, two boys and three girls.) Oh how I can just roll my eyes thinking of those mornings when one of the girls would blurt out, “Mom, he’s looking at me again!” My answer: “So what. Eat your breakfast.”

This is how I feel about social media, especially Facebook. It’s called “Face-book” right? Now we have many more, Instagram, Linkedin, etc. All are geared toward others finding us, interacting with them, and getting to know them. We all have the ability to block those we don’t desire to communicate with. I guess we call it a personal space safety net, and one that I also do appreciate. We all need our personal space in person and online.

What really gives me a giggle is when someone puts up their profile on social media but then will only allow the public to see certain things about them (just so some can know they are doing well) but block them from seeing it all. It’s kind of ridiculous really. Or if someone finds out that we have “seen” their profile or have looked at it. Why do people get so upset about this? Again, its social media. Getting upset because someone has looked at our profile is like going to a party and hiding in the closet. People can know we are there and that we look great but they can’t see everything. God forbid that we interact! I want to laugh here because I find it so stupid. Oh, I’ve ranted about this before. Of course we do have those unsavory stalkers that pop up but that is what blocking is for. It’s also what saying no to a party is for as well.

We do have a choice. The funny thing is making the choice to be seen but getting upset when we are. Anyone with me here? It confuses me like the reality that anyone can send mail to our home mailbox but the same person sending email to us can be a no no. Yes, email can be flooded with a lot of unwelcome things but those things are just as tangible as real mail is.

When I put up my profiles on social media it’s because I want people to find my writing, my posts, and sometimes me. If someone bothers me I block them and they can’t see any of it. They still can read my blog writing or see my website. It’s alright with me! LOOK! It’s what its there for.

Personal boundaries aside, we all should recognize we are meant to be a united humanity. We struggle with getting along though. So, we have need of personal space and sometimes have to do some blocking.  Yet, when we are in public we are seen just as much as our social profile, if not more. When someone sees me in person they see it all just as it is. No hiding the 5 pounds I put on lately or if I am having the best day that day. Sometimes we cry, we are angry, we are in bad situations, and we are lost. There are days that are the opposite. Exposing them does not make us weak, it makes us strong and real; someone others can relate to.

I often wonder when we will ever be family or if we always will be upset because “someone is looking at us”. I wonder if God, our passed over loved ones, or if the angels roll their eyes and say, “So what. Eat your breakfast.”

PS. Next time someone unexpected looks at your profile, say cheese, smile, take a photo, post it, and be honored they counted you so important!

Loving you from here, 

Dr Rev Jenine Marie Howry

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