WARNING: THIS IS GOING TO BE A RANT! I AM WRITING THIS POST ON BEHALF OF ALL OF THOSE WHO STUDIED HARD TO BECOME CLINICAL COUNSELORS, LIFE COACHES, AND THERAPISTS OVER THE YEARS. FAD IDEAS CAN NOT REPLACE YEARS OF EDUCATION AND MONEY SPENT TOWARD WORKING ON HELPING OTHERS TO HEAL FROM THE INSIDE OUT. NOT TO MENTION THOSE OF US WHO HAVE STUDIED ALTERNATIVE METHODS OF SOUL HEALING TO BRING THE BEST TO OFFER OUR CLIENTS.
I was listening to another podcast from an influencer again today, and honestly, I got really ticked off. Of course, we all have our own opinions and should be able to voice them as we see fit. In the same respect, I have the option to NOT listen and to have an opinion of my own. Unfortunately, for some people, I will not support those who monetize content that has no psychological, spiritual, emotional, or soulful healing. I love “beautiful” just as much as the next person, and I love to look my best. I love being told I am beautiful, but I love more to be told what a beautiful person I am. To say if we look our best on the outside, then we will do better on the inside is something I am shaking my head at.
The “theory” that beauty and success come from the outside is equivalent to putting the icing on a meatloaf and calling it cake. (You may quote me here). Seriously. Here is why I am really miffed about that whole mentality.
ONE
A falsehood is being used as positive psychology and gives off a “fake it on the outside until you make it” mentality, leaving a lot of hurtful undealt with emotions below the surface. I love my clothes, jewelry, and makeup just as much as any other woman might, but none of those things would heal me or get me through a night of crying after I lost my children or the hurts I endured through a divorce or the loss of my business, etc. Do you see what I am getting at here?
TWO
The “beauty from the outside in” theory adds to the delineation of women, placing them in the position of having to keep up on the outside, or they might not measure up with others. It puts an air of competition out there that women have suffered with for generations. It also fosters the idea that women are to be admired and looked at for what is on the outside first, which is, in my opinion, just plain WRONG! We are so much more valuable than that!
THREE
Women who spread, “If we look good on the outside first, we will then feel better on the inside,” are offering a temporary fix, not to mention acting as a therapist, which they are NOT! This can be dangerous. Yes, I do feel great when working toward looking my best, but I feel better when my life looks better and I receive soul healing. Yes, we want to put our best foot forward, especially in business or on a job interview. If we are not alright on the inside, there is no amount of clothing, makeup, or jewelry that will fix that reality. Eventually, we must face our fears, limitations, and soul scars.
This is the bottom line, like it or not. Work on what is going on with you on the inside. Yes, look your best, but don’t buy into the fake psychology that your clothing will change you because it won’t. We all have to do the work; this is a fact.
Don’t be taken in by those who want to sell you the magic beans. There is magic in life, which is true, but it projects from the inside and from who we are, not what we wear. Anyone who tells you otherwise tries to sell you things and not help your heart. Know the difference between looking your best because it radiates from the inside first and the false hope faking it will give you. I repeat, do the work.
Loving you from here,
Dr. Rev. Jenine Marie Howry
Life Lessons by Jenine Marie 