This is a very hard subject for me, because I have always felt like it was my job to help others feel better, find better solutions, and be more comfortable in life. To some degree that is true or I would not have studied human behavior, God’s word, other means of relaxation, stress reduction, and much more. I have a huge sigh here, because it is all so overwhelming when I think of all the hours I have spent on research and discovery regardless to what the source is. It was never ever time wasted. It has it’s purpose.
This is a very important subject, so please, if you will, “listen” very carefully to the heart and spirit in which it is written. I have personally spent a good majority of my life being the one who tries to make things better for others. I am the one who has been concerned when someone goes to jail, has stayed up all night praying for miracles for others, hidden in my room while others fight and duke it out, fought for the right to be understood in the midst of relationship confusion, surrendered to what brings others happiness, worried when those I loved did not come home at night, adhered to others’ doctrinal statements, and the list goes on and on. I’m hardly a martyr, so please don’t go there. The full truth of the whole deal is that I truly have loved them. I have loved those who gave birth to me, were raised around me, those I have married, those I have raised, those whom I worshiped with, prayed with, gone to school with, and befriended. The journey has been worth it, no doubt.
Here is the point of the whole message. The only one I did not love enough was myself. You see, I always thought when I married Jesus and was ordained, that the point was I should give my life away. It has been a struggle ever since. This is an error though. A system of belief told me I have to give my life away. Jesus NEVER told me to sacrifice my own happiness, joy, well being, or self love, for others. His power, His message, and His love, is enough for all of us. My job is to point those around me to Him. It is their job to accept it or not. I can offer the decision for life changes, but I can’t ever make anyone take the decision or make the choices. As much as we love people and want them to be happy and whole, we do not have the power to create that for them. They have to do that with God themselves. It was not until everything inside of me was screaming to find out who I am again, that I really began the process of loving myself more, even though this was what I taught others. Interestingly enough, this change happened very recently after 30 years of being a minister.
I guess my point of this whole message is this: empowerment comes when we love ourselves enough to accept the strength God gives to us and grow into the whole person Jesus has loved enough to die for. He died when we were yet sinners. He died when we where flawed and broken. He died knowing we would make all of the mistakes we have made, and yet, He has loved us anyway. If we want to be more like Him, we need to love ourselves anyway. This means loving ourselves enough to find out what that means, and do whatever it takes to reach for our own personal destinies. Are we there for others when they need us? Of course we are! It is great to give our lives over to the things that have great meaning in life and serve our fellow man and woman! I have to ask this question though, “Is it better to give of ourselves when we are depleted, or is it better to give of ourselves when we are as whole as we can be”. Being whole is the only way we can give an image of wholeness to anyone.
Today I am gifting you with the message to “come after it from a place of wholeness”. Love yourself enough, the way God loves you, to heal from the inside out. Know you will never ever be perfect, and no one on this earth will ever completely agree with you 100% on things in your life. Be the very best you that you can ever be. It is the greatest gift you can give yourself, to those who love you, and to humanity.
If you need or want help. I will do what I can to help you and give God the rest. Here is the deal though: you have to honestly want the message and the change. I can’t do for you what you need to do for yourself. You have to find the love that God put within you to bring you enough strength to do whatever it takes. Sometimes it feels like we go almost to the “pit of hell” on this earth for what we really want but the bliss of heaven awaits those who endure to the end! That is God’s promise!
Rev Jenine Marie (Still married to Jesus!)