What to do When Someone Hurts You Deeply

I’m sure you are aware of this by now, but we are people. Human. We are meant to “feel” but there are times when we can become too hurt and feelings can be overwhelming. We can become hurt within our feelings and emotions but there are times when someone hurts us so badly that it becomes internalized to the point of extreme heartache. Thank goodness we are resilient and there are things we can do when hurt becomes complete heartache. Here are some helpful suggestions you can choose when your heart has been bruised way too much and you need a plan of recovery.

1. Honor your feelings. Don’t try to stuff your feelings or deny anything happened by distracting yourself. Stuffing is what we put into Thanksgiving turkeys, not our internal emotional bodies. If you stuff your feelings and not allow the hurt to come out it will seep into your life in other ways later or even sooner. Let the hurt out before it has a chance to become hardened or ugly. Stay pliable and allow your heart to emote. Even if this means a few days of crying softly or hard. Your body knows what it needs. Allow the tears to flow like a river and don’t stop until you get it all out as best you can.
2. Honor your body. Take very good care of yourself. Spend time resting, sleeping, meditating, or listening to soft music. Rest is your body’s way of restoring itself. Sleep is the best rest for you. It will rest your brain, your heart, your body, and your emotions. Your body is created to rejuvenate itself during times of rest and slumber. Don’t lay awake at night going over what hurt you. There is plenty of time to take a deeper look at it later.
3. Drink plenty of water. Your body is mostly made up of water and you have dehydrated yourself with your tears or even lack of water intake. Drink a few water bottles of water daily, throughout the day and night. You can add some green tea or a drink with electrolytes to replace some of the salt, sugars, and fluids in your body. Your body will thank you later!
4. Read good books or articles that feed your soul or watch programs that interest you. Your brain never stops thinking or taking in information, so give it something to feed on!
5. Dream and design your life. Give yourself some time to dream. Hope keeps us going and without it, we tend to come into despair. In the bible, it says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick.” You are heartsick enough, don’t allow a lack of hope to make it worse. You are on the mend not creating more harm to yourself.
6. Respect your right to privacy. Keep in solitude if you need to. Allow yourself plenty of time to restore yourself back to your pre-hurt state. Some alone time can be important.
7. Talk to a good friend or counselor. Allowing a compassionate person to be there for you can do wonders, especially if it is someone who makes you laugh. Laughter is good medicine. Your body, mind, and soul love the spirit of laughter! So laugh as much as you can. Watch comedies or funny movies and give yourself some natural medicine.
8. Forgive. Forgive yourself in the presence of God and forgive the one who harmed you. Your forgiveness does not justify what they might have done, nor does it free them from the responsibility but it will free yourself from the attachment to it or the karma. Walking in forgiveness is walking in the Spirit of God and keeps you close to God’s healing power and wisdom. Allow God to be the first to inspire you in the morning and at night.
9. Meditate. Use time to allow your mind to wander, explore, and receive from God and Spirit. Mediation can bring you great relief during times of sorrow and pain. Don’t worry about your technique. Just go into your meditative time and trust and allow. Whatever comes of it is what it is. No pressure! You have had enough pressure.
10. Journal. Get your feelings out on paper and journal away. Keep as honest as you possibly can. Whatever you allow to come out will no longer threaten the insides of you, so let it flow like a river just like your tears.
11. Eat nutrient-dense foods. Eat and feed your body well to keep it strong with nutrient-dense foods. This is not to say some comfort food is not a good idea! So have that Kit Kat bar!
12. Get some sunlight and exercise. Even if it is just a few moments a day just a little light to stimulate the pineal gland and some exercise to oxygenate your body! Keep yourself focused on repair and your body will respond in favorable ways!

I hope these suggestions are helpful. Be spiritually minded but intellectual at the same time. We need both in this life to make it complete and to find complete answers to life’s dilemmas we find ourselves in!

If you feel in deep distress seek out a professional therapist or medical professional to help you through your difficult time.

Loving you from here,

Dr. Rev. Jenine Marie Howry

Jenine Marie is a metaphysical minister and spiritual counselor-coach