Characteristics of Love: Love is Patient

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As I have mentioned in previous blog posts, real love is not a feeling, although there is a component of love that brings about emotion. Sometimes the emotion gives a sense of “feeling good” or “feeling bad”. I think this is where our painful love songs tend to come from and the ones that add to the idea that  love is exhilarating. It can be, because attraction can be euphoric. It’s supposed to be that way or no one would ever become involved with others. The euphoria we feel is experienced through the release of feel good neurotransmitters, or chemicals, from the brain. They, of course, trigger our emotions. Our hearts pound, our brains feel fixated on thoughts of a new connection with someone we feel very special about. These are wonderful! Don’t miss those moments.

Real love has to do with characteristics. One of the definitions of God is “love”. What is being defined are the characteristics of love and those of God. The bible sends a message that describes love in the form of the characteristics of God and what real love should be like. One, is that “love is patient”. Patience waits. It waits through adversity, questioning, difficulty, or even upon beautiful anticipated moments. Patience as a characteristic of love states, “I will wait for you until you catch up”, or “I will wait for you no matter what.” Patience brings the ability to persevere. Perseverance is the character muscle that is built up when we work on being patient with someone or even ourselves. Think about how painful building muscle can be. Building perseverance through patience can be painful as well. It means we have to WAIT. Keep in mind that waiting builds strength. When we learn to wait we become internally stronger and more stable in our ability to love.

Being patient also means to love during adversity or even bad behavior. We don’t have to love the behavior. This is where we get confused. It is possible to love a person but not the behavior coming from them. We don’t have to accept bad behavior either, but we can step back and wait because that is what love does. That is what God does with us. God waits. He waits through our bad behavior, through our growth spurts, through our hard decisions and through our distractions in life. Aren’t you glad He waits? If it were not truth, then it would mean that God would leave us, which is promised would never happen.

When I close my eyes and think of God waiting, I get a sense of a presence that is still, silent, and embracing. Being patient is easier with this image in mind. The next time you express impatience, take a deep breath and take this image with you. Think of God as being still, silent, loving, and waiting. Think of God as embracing and caring. Allow this image to fill your heart with love for whomever you feel impatient with. Even if you are feeling impatient with yourself, take the time to see the image of God in this way. Then take that image and visualize it as light moving into your heart and circulate it through your whole being. Use mindfulness to state to yourself, ” I am perfecting patience, and I am persevering. I am loving.”

Then thank yourself for taking on a characteristic of true love!

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry

Here Is Your Weekly Wisdom: Be Patient, Your Time Will Come!

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It’s so hard when we see others get the things in life we want when we have waited such a long time. Patience is not always easy, but always worth it. If you are doing everything you can to make something happen and there is still a delay, then understand there is a good reason

Sometimes we receive something better than what we had in mind, or sometimes we grow during the waiting time. Often, there are things we choose and later find out that it never suited us to begin with. Maybe it’s a bad decision and God is saying “no”.

Trust your instincts, be patient, do all you can to achieve your desires, and let the powers that “be” help in the transformation. Have confidence that you have not been forgotten nor forsaken. Your turn will come and it will be better than you even expected!

Loving you from here,

Dr. Rev. Jenine Marie Howry

Establishing Yourself in the “Void”

JenineHowry2I was watching a movie the other night and one of the characters proclaimed, “I don’t know what is wrong with me, I feel so empty.” In the story line she was in transition. Her life had a pending new decision which meant letting go of all that is for soon what will be. In the mean time, her life was void, empty, seemingly stuck. I nodded as I listened to her mostly complain and cry. Drama will be drama. I understood her statement though. I think we have all been there. In “the void”.

The void is that place where we think is dark and empty. It seems that way when we are there. In truth, though, it’s a place filled with expectation and creation. Remember, God created from that which was void and made beautiful things. The void is a place of learning to let go of what was for what will be. It’s a place of utilizing our faith and imagination to create new things. Yes, it is also an exercise in patience!

The challenge here is becoming comfortable in that place of being “in between” things in life. Our first inclination is to “feel empty” like the character in the movie I was watching. Actually the void is filled with possibilities. Just think of having every opportunity to create anything you want while waiting for new things to happen in life. As you wave good bye to what will soon be past, you will be preparing to wave hello to your future! The void is a place of deep imagination and intuitive creativity. Can you think of what you really want in life and picture it so much that you actually FEEL it?

Close your eyes for a moment and picture something you really want for your life. Don’t open them again until you feel it will all your being. Feel the excitement, see the colors, and sense the newness of the future. This is the place of infinite possibilities! Are you excited for this place now? Smile, because you have every opportunity to create something beautiful while you are in between everything else.

Affirm this with me:

“I love this place that is filled with opportunity and creative genius! I can see all possibilities here and feel excited for my future!”

Loving you from here,

Jenine Marie Howry