Every Child Born is in Divine Timing

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I was told, as the story goes, I was not expected to be here. I guess better words are my parents never thought they could have another child after my sister. I was supposed to be here though. Maybe I taught my parents about miracles? I’m not sure, it was their lesson. My lesson has been about divine timing. Do you ever get the feeling God puts us together in circles of others like puzzle pieces to make a bigger picture?

I’m not sure creating a huge puzzle is God’s intention regarding creation but I do know we are no good without each other. Without one of us a piece is missing. When I was 21 years old I gave birth to a son. I was stretched in my ability to be a new mother and yet blessed to have him for 20 years. It’s hard to imagine someone coming into our lives and then having to leave after just 20 years. It’s a long time, two decades, but a small amount of time to have a son on the earth.

I often wondered if he was born at the wrong time, but that would disrupt my belief we all have divine timing and a purpose. I’m not sure my son found his purpose, and I’m still not even sure I have found the lesson I learned as his mother. Patience is always a lesson but maybe strength is a better one to speak of here. I raised him mostly on my own. I saw things in myself I did not like and things that I never thought possible in myself.

His timing was never a mistake. God does not make those kind of mistakes. Having him and each of my children was a glimmer of hope that this world could be a better place just by bringing in someone new. I suppose I never thought I was giving birth to my future but my children aligned my future for sure.

Birth itself is a miraculous thing. It’s not easy but God always blessed me with joy after the sorrow. Isn’t God just like that? We go through sorrows but joy always comes as a result. Maybe sometimes that joy is simply relief. Maybe sometimes it is hope being revealed. Every child is a divine reason to have joy. I believe each one of us was born at just the right time, the right place, for the right reasons. Our earthly minds can’t always perceive those things but the higher part of ourselves can come to understand God’s wisdom within it all. It’s great to be a creator with God, isn’t it?

One night, over 2000 years ago, a little baby was born and His life seemed to be far before the world’s time. Yet His purpose was right on time. His death was on time as well. God knows the number of our days before we even come here. I think if we knew them we would never learn or teach the lessons we are here for.

Every single child, person, individual, is born at the right time, the right place, and for the right reason. It does not matter how the child gets here. Remember Jesus was born out of wedlock, was raised by a step father, His conception not planned by human timing, but His coming was divine and right on time.

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry, PhD

Jenine Marie Coaching and Ministries LLC

 

You Are Never Abandoned

 

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Feeling abandoned is horrible. Yet, it is only a feeling and not “Truth”. People tend to look at the idea of abandonment and believe it means that there is no one to turn to or someone human has left us. Although this is a human and valid feeling it is only a limited truth. The reality is we are never abandoned and never ever alone. Dark nights can loom up during hard moments. Our breath can feel tight and in response our bodies become tight as well. Maybe those that used to be on the other end of a phone line are not there any longer, but this does not mean abandonment.

God has given to us a sweet choir of spiritual support that never will go away from us. God’s promise is to command angels to watch over us, especially in times of trial and confusion. All it takes is to go out and listen to the sound of the breeze moving through the trees. There is a beauty in the sound and a sense of God’s support. The sun shines brightly and the sparkle upon water or in the green grass can be even more calming than even the voice of a human being.

God’s love letter speaks to us about never being abandoned as orphans. I believe we have much more in the spirit world than we often care to admit. Where do those ideas come from when we wake up in the morning? Or, even those spiritual downloads while in the shower, drying our hair, or driving with the windows down on a long country road? It’s God’s spiritual watch committee that is there every time of day or night. Angels are activated when we ask for them. Jesus is present even when we don’t ask. Love abounds for us 24/7. Just because we don’t “see” them does not mean no one is there.

Jesus said we are blessed when we do not see and yet still believe. I feel sometimes God allows us to feel alone so we will reach out to the spiritual support group we have but can not see. Jesus said to ask and it will be given to us. We have not, because we ask not. This means asking for anything at any time. God’s loving support group will respond with an answer, hope, encouragement and guidance.

Take it for a test drive! You never know until you ask. Believe when you do ask that you will receive. We live in a perfect harmonious universe that was created by God just for us. When your heart feels less than harmonious, reach out to the ones who have been created and placed in special spaces just for you! You will get a reply. People might let you down but God’s hosts will never let you down.

Loving you form here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry, PhD

I Know of a Man Who Was Named Saul

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There once was a man named Saul. He seemed to be a very heartless person. You see, Saul had a spirit of self righteousness and absolutely hated Christians! We all know how the ego part of us get us in to trouble. Well, Saul had a big one of those! I have a personal theory that Saul persecuted Christians because deep in his heart he was jealous of them. The bible does not say he was jealous, but I feel that could have been some of his motivation. There they were, a newly excited people, named Christians because of their belief in the Christed One; Jesus. They had an encounter with the risen Christ. How could they not be excited? There was new evidence that more awaited them after they left this world as they knew it.

Saul was determined to dampen their spirit but he could not. The joy of the new Christians was so overwhelming that nothing could take away their excitement. Yes, there was persecution. We all endure this today. We are persecuted whether we are Christian or not. It makes no difference. Still, in certain circles if we mention the name Jesus, people will move away from us. It’s all good. It’s not our issue.

Anyway, God, who sees the hearts of all men and women, apparently looked into Saul’s heart and saw something he obviously did not allow to show. There was great love and also extreme determination. Very slyly Jesus met Saul while he was traveling down a long lonely road to Damascus. Jesus, at this time was arisen! So He appeared as His glorified self to Saul. What a sight that must have been!

Saul had a change of heart after his experience that left him blind for a few days. Any time we look into a great light our eyes can not see anything but a shadow of the figure we were staring at. Jesus is a great light! After this experience Saul’s name was changed to Paul to reflect the heart that was revealed within him. God had taken a heart of stone and gave Saul a heart of flesh. In other words, he was softened. A heart that once caused him to glare at Christians in order to kill them, now had great love for them. I’m sure this confused many. God knew that Paul had what it took to carry on and spread good news to all he encountered and move onward to write most of what we know as the New Testament of the bible.

What a difference a day makes, right? God does not look at worthiness in us, He sees potential. Nothing can ever make us worthy, but a lot can give us potential. We have the potential to love, create, give, have compassions, and do great things among the people of our age. Need I go on? As I stare at a statue of Jesus with his arms lifted high in the air that my son gave to me one Christmas, it reminds me of the potential my son carries in his heart. His actions might not have always reflected the right choices, but I know that his heart is a sweet one that God loves very much. I know God sees his goodness and his love for a Savior who will never allow him to be out of His reach.

It is the same with you. God will never move away from you. My late son, Jayson, loved the book of Romans chapter 8 in the bible. The book explains that nothing can ever take God’s love from us, and I mean NOTHING. This is important for those who truly need to know they are loved. Sometimes we feel we are not. God always loves us. Even during our darkest hours. In fact, He is there for us more during our times of darkness shining brightly and waiting for us to call on Him. When we do, he reveals Himself in as much a profound way he did to Saul. Our road might not be the same as Sauls and we might not write books that stand the test of time, but no matter what we do, the Lord is with us. He says, “Even to the end of the age…”

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry

Characteristics of Love: Love is Not Self-Seeking

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Not being self seeking can be confusing at first. On one hand we can not give of anything until we have it within ourselves. Being self assured, self giving, and providing self care are all good things. We do need to seek our healing, our inner light, and to seek out what is best in our lives. We give out of the overflow of what we have and who we are. We also self seek when we seek God to an extent. We seek to lose fear, define our lives, search out our purpose and expand our horizons. These are all great things and we should all do them!

I believe what the author is saying here is that love does not behave selfishly with an attitude of entitlement over the needs of others. It’s very different to be self loving from being selfish and self centered in an arrogant way. Arrogance is a form of pride that lords itself over others. The type of self seeking that love is not is the kind that says, “I deserve more than you because I am better than you are.” True love never sees anyone that way, but sees us all as equal even when we don’t all behave on the playground.

We might have different places we fill in business, in life, or in family, but we are all equal in God’s sight. To self seek is to seek without God, from ego and not through Spirit. God’s Spirit is Holy and there is nothing prideful or arrogant within the love that is held in God’s Holiness. Self seeking is also a state of division. It states that a person feels they are higher or above all others and therefore deserve preference over others. It denies the Oneness that Jesus prayed to “the Father” about.

When we are looking to embody true God-love we do not seek preference over others but see one another as equal. We understand that we are not completely whole without one another. Everyone is in a state of “becoming”, so not everyone will be on the same spiritual path as another. Jesus did not come to the earth to just visit so He could establish a set of people who would have it all and others would not. Truth says Jesus came for the whole world, to set people free, to show the way, to relieve us all of condemnation, to pour out grace, to teach healing, and point the way toward eternity. Jesus laid down His life for EVERY human being ever created and came to this planet. That means people who were before, who were then, and who were to be. Literally EVERYONE. Not just those who believe as He does but even those who do not believe at all. Jesus was and is the supreme example of love if we ever saw one. He displayed a love that was never self seeking; a love that laid itself down for those who needed it more.

Do you want to embody this kind of love? Its hard when our human side always will compete to interfere. I believe this comes from not being healed from past trauma. We only act and react poorly from our soul scars. When we are healed and clean from those things then God within us can become bigger and more profoundly present. Remember Peter in the bible? People were healed just walking into Peter’s shadow. Peter did not receive any special preference from God or special grace. Jesus said we all could do greater things than even He had. When He said, “all” he meant everyone. Only pure love and faith could be that profound as to heal others with just being present. Isn’t that the express image of God’s love?

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry

 

Characteristics of Love: Love Does Not Delight in Evil but Rejoices With the Truth

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If you have been following along with my blog posts lately you might have discovered my “love” series is taken from the attributes of love described in the bible in the book of 1 Corinthians chapter 13. Isn’t it nice that we have a guideline? I kind of skipped to this one because it stood out for me today as something we all should pay attention to in this world. We pretty much have a mixed bag of nuts here on earth, and I say that respectfully! What I mean, is there is a huge combination between evil and truth. Maybe it just seems that way because technology allows us to know more than we used to. Or evil seems to be getting more prevalent. A lot of the minor negative issues in our world today have more to do with impatience and lies. Then there are the real evil issues like bombings, murders and war.

What I am going to address are inner characteristics that have to do with God’s love and what it means to embody it. As you might have discovered by now, especially if you have been reading my posts, it is a powerful thing to carry. God’s love is so powerful, I believe it heals. I’m sure the purest of love was in Jesus as He walked this earth and healed so many. Someone who does not delight in evil is someone who always wants the best for themselves and others. This means even our perceived enemies or those who have done us wrong. Embodying real love and truth means we always want the best for people no matter what. As you might perceive, this takes humility and forgiveness. Again, as I always emphasize, neither of these means we tolerate bad behavior. It just means their behavior does not cause us to want them to be harmed in any way. We might feel that way in the beginning but real love will act as a covering.

In the story of Adam and Eve, God covered their “nakedness” in the garden after they disobeyed Him and lied about it. God saw through this because the Spirit of God is all knowing. Their nakedness symbolizes this exposure. Yet, God is pure love and can not hate. Within His forgiveness He covered them. In the story it was a literal covering of their body, but symbolically it is a protection from harm and an example of true God-love.  They received discipline. True love always disciplines as well. We can not think we will do harm and then expect to not have it come back upon us, but God’s grace always protects and covers us when we go to the temple of humility and truth. Grace and forgiveness are powerful healers but they are always balanced with discipline and consequences. This is a part of our God created universe of law and balance.

When the truth wins out, we are walking in divine love and honesty. This means being honest with ourselves as much as with others. Actually, we have to be honest with ourselves first before we can be honest with others. Either way, we have God in our temple inside and everything is exposed anyway. Often, like Adam and Eve, we trick ourselves into believing if no one knows or finds out then a lie does not exist or we will escape the full discipline for our hidden actions. Not true. How can we hide anything from God who lives in us? There is a Scripture in the bible that says, “be sure your sin will find you out.”  This means you will be exposed by the pure standard that is set up by the love of God. It is not that God wants you to “be in trouble” but to expose you so you will be disciplined, humbled, and covered. God wants healing and pure love and truth. True love always rejoices when the truth wins out.

It might not seem fair to not be able to hide in our mistakes and lies but actually the most loving thing in the world is to be exposed. How can we ever learn the power of true love if there is no discipline for our actions. So we can therefore rejoice when the truth wins out! Whether is it for ourselves or others, to see discipline within the truth is to see true love in action. It is a powerful cleansing and the beginning of walking in more of the Light of Life. A lie will bring spiritual death. The truth will bring life. Jesus was a huge advocate of the truth. As God has explained, it sets us free. This is the same whether it is truth, the opposite of a lie, or divine higher truth about our spiritual existence. A lie will fragment us but the truth will make us whole. A lie separates us, but the truth will delight in our unity.

So, you see, to not delight in evil on any level actually heals. We should desire evil to be exposed and to expose it when we are able. When we do this we are acting in true love. The Light always wants to shine to expose darkness. In that way there is more Light and more truth.

I remember when I was a child I lied to my mother about a very insignificant thing. Boy was she angry! I wondered why she got upset over something so small. I even wondered why I lied about something so small. Anyway, I was banished from my favorite television program and sent to my room with the door closed. She never came in to check on me even when she heard me crying. That was a very dark night for me as a little girl but very significant. I had to face my lie. Yes, I had tried to cover it up first, but it was exposed, and very quickly. I was not very happy about that at the moment but I had to face the consequences of my actions. It might seem very insignificant considering the issues we face in this world today but the lesson is the same. We can not hide from the light of truth. It always seeks out to expose us, teach us, humble us, heal us, and grow us up. I told my mother the truth after that, even when it was hard. It often was hard, but I found she was easier on me when I was honest than when I thought I got away with something.

I know it might seem like a childish lesson but in all honesty, had she not exposed it, I might have grown to be a less honest person. We bonded closer after that. The truth always wins out, wants the best for all of us, and is the highest form of love there is. It’s God love and the lesson I learned helped me to also expose evil and lies much easier and stronger since I understand it’s the right thing to do. It’s a loving thing to do. Sometimes it makes people very angry but exposure is still a very loving thing to do.

So, please, understand to not delight in evil. Don’t wish harm on anyone no matter what they have done. Expose the lies you know of, especially if they are your own, and allow the truth to win out. That way we can all rejoice in the truth whether it is human truth or higher spiritual truth. Exposure and discipline will give us both of them.

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry

Have You Discovered the Power of Taking Holy Moments?

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This morning I sat with my tea just waking up and taking in the new day. I closed my eyes for a moment and the first thing I noticed was all of the noise that usually goes unnoticed. The heater came on, a car went by outside, birds were chirping in the trees, and then the ding of a message coming in on my phone. Our lives and world is filled with noise every day. The only time we are really not consciously aware of it is when we sleep. I can’t explain it, with my eyes still closed, the world suddenly came alive with deeper sounds and things I never noticed before. I realized the heater also makes a howling noise when it is on, the house creaks, and I actually sense light even when my eyes are closed.

Taking a holy moment to just “be” is so revealing, especially when beginning to recognize personal thoughts, senses of the body, or setting intentions of how the day could unfold. I remember reading a book written by Marianne Williamson a long time ago and also her famous quote, “Sacred silence writes the universe.” I thought about the moment just prior to creation and how that silence might have been. What an amazing moment in a void space of time when God took a breath and began creating. It boggles my mind to even consider what a great mind God truly is. I think it goes beyond personal comprehension and is far greater than our human existence can even fathom. Then with great intention God creates.

It’s how our day should begin and how it could be if we design it that way; a holy moment with God and the intention to create the day whatever way we partner in creating it. Think about this, “Without intention our lives seem random as the day unfolds.” It does not have to be that way. Of course, things happen that we can not control but we can control how we respond to them. I wondered this morning, what it might be like to have a day that unfolds with sacred and intended responses.

“Today I will take a breath and intend to be patient when I am tempted to be impatient.”

“I will walk in acceptance that the only life I can have control over is my own.”

Intentions can be much more powerful than we even realize. Could it be because we are not listening or taking sacred silence? When we listen, answers are there for our questions and questions come up we never thought of. It almost feels like the world forgot how to breathe, ask, listen, observe, and intend. Have we forgotten about the holy moment God taught us to have when creation began? Maybe we are in too much of a hurry to take the time to actually do the work that creation and intention require? Not taking the time can be costly though. That leaves our lives and days to unfold in what seems like a random way. If the way we respond to what comes our way is not set with intention our responses are left to our ego self instead of the part of us that is connected to our creative creator.

Maybe this sounds way too deep to take in during a morning cup of tea, but it is important. Can you imagine if we all took a holy moment every day or even several times a day? We can intend to be more kind, respond with more wisdom, pause before we respond at all. Maybe we can be more conscious of what comes out of our mouths. Are our responses positive, necessary, or true? Taking a holy moment to set our intention for each day can help calm some of the emotion we deal with. Emotions are important but they can cause our lives to feel like we are riding in a sail boat being tossed around by an angry or uncontrollable sea. Jesus once calmed those angry and uncontrollable waves. I think it was King David who asked God to level the hills and valleys. Could he have been setting an intention with God to not react in such an emotional or uncontrolled way?

Life can be a “hills and valleys” kind of ride without taking holy moments to sit in sacred silence. If you have not, take that time now and take it every day when you wake. Yes, it requires you create a new habit if you don’t do this already. You will thank yourself and thank God if you do. Give it a try!

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry

What is an “Old Soul”?

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I hear the term “old soul” flipped around a lot lately. I think it has been an indication that I need clarification. I love clarity. It means “clear seeing”. It moves the fog away from life and allows us to see things through the eyes of truth and wisdom. I had to really consider how I was going to explain this term. After all, it does not fit with everyone’s understanding. That is ok! Those who get it, really get it. Those who don’t maybe will some day.

Often, I hear the term old soul attached to a person who seems to have a sense of early spiritual maturity or even practical maturity. Most of the time these are individuals who have had a very difficult childhood and had been forced to grow up fast. They had to take care of themselves so that is what they learned to do. They present as someone who is advanced or mature in their life skills but still have a yearning for child like things. They might even seem like a child at times or they are often seeking their early childhood days because they never had the opportunity to have one. They are independent thinkers and can move and find their way around just about anything. This could be a good thing or not so good. It depends on the intent of the heart. Usually, this person will appear to be wise but their wisdom is obtained from the preservation of themselves. This is not an “old soul” by spiritual definition in the context of ascension.

An old soul is someone who was born into this life and obviously has a planned out purpose for humanity as a whole. An old soul will lift humanity to another level wherever they are and whatever they do. They are born with compassion with passion.  They have teaching and healing abilities that are gifted for the sake of the message they are sent to play out in their lives. Old soul examples are Mother Theresa, Dr Martin Luther King Jr, Gandhi, The Dalai Lama, Jesus who is/was the Christ, Mother Mary, the Apostle Paul and others like them. I’m sure there are many more I could think of but these are pretty good examples. The wisdom that came, or come, from these souls lifted and taught all of those who were around them. They lived, and live, a life of purpose and passion for that purpose. Their lives have been given over to a higher dimension of understanding. You would not find any self centeredness in these individuals. Their lives have been given over to higher purposes.

Obviously “old soul” has nothing to do with chronological age, but soul evolution or maturity. Usually they are those who have gone through much trial to present the messages that have been somehow infused into their spiritual DNA. They are human and yet evolved as teachers and “way showers”. The example in Jesus is that He showed the way to eternal life. He also did a lot of other amazing things while embodied here on earth. It does not mean that trials never touch them. Trials are a part of human life as Jesus taught us all. Without them, there would be no growth as a soul. True old souls give us an opportunity to learn the best ways to grow as people, just by virtue of watching their lives. They lead by example and usually are pretty good at speaking truth when truth is needed.

I hope this makes sense in defining the term. If not anything else, they give us all something to reach for! Whatever you reach for, let it be for the stars! You are here for a reason as well and whatever that reason is, it is important!

Loving you from here,

Dr Rev Jenine Marie Howry

Brother Against Brother, and So it Goes On…

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If you live in this world you can not help but see or hear of some of the discord or violence experienced in it. It always seems like it’s worse than it ever has been. We hear of how violence is increasing. It might be. Or maybe violence is being enacted in a different way than in the past. Who can forget the holocaust, both world wars and Pearl Harbor? Remember when Isis was all over the news or, looking back, the old wild west when guns were up front and personal?

This morning, I am reminded of the first recorded murder in the Bible when one brother killed another. It’s hard to grasp the emotion of things when we read them. Can you imagine the horror of that event? Bottom line, it does not matter what age we live in, or how violence is enacted. Through it, we see the depth of human frustration and a lack of the things that are really important. Regardless as to how anger and violence are displayed its always the same. Brother against brother, sister against sister, and friends deciding to be foes. One side wants one thing and other side wants another, so they decide to war about it. One person gets offended and then the other gets the blame. One person blames another and the other gets offended. When does it end?

This might seem a bit simplistic but it starts with you, us, them. It begins with all of us because we are one. That is if we decide to really look at things from a higher perspective. From our oneness perspective it’s hard to forget when we do something to another we have just done it to ourselves. From a higher spiritual realm when one calls a person a name they just pointed a finger at themselves. If one person is that name then we all are. Sounds pretty strange doesn’t it? When we decide to think of things this way it’s easier to not do the wrong things. Why does brother have to be against brother when they are both going to experience the same pain? Why bring that on? It confuses me. Humans should get this by now but we don’t. We still yell, “Racist!”, when there is no race but the human race. Some still murder not even realizing that the person that is now gone had a personal and spiritual impact on this world. One never knows the part they might have played in the life of the murderous person. Businesses forget to be ambassadors of peace among people instead of placing blame, causing one to continue to smolder against another. When nothing is solved then nothing is solved. Period. We are all called to be ambassadors and yet when we try, we are looked upon like it is none of our business. In truth, it’s ALL of our business! There would be NO business if it was not all of our business. Put that on a T-shirt!

I used to sit at the edge of a stream where I used to live and throw rocks into the water, watching the water span out because of the impact. This is how each of us impact our world. We are one rock, but our influence spans out among many. I remember Jesus’ words concerning the stoning of an adulterous woman, “He who is without sin, cast the first stone.” No one did. They all walked away. Had one person thrown a stone it would have affected everyone. I always wondered where the men were that the “adulterous woman” committed adultery with. Maybe that is why all of the men walked away that day. No one could stand innocent of that sin before Jesus.

I guess I should get to my point here. If we truly want harmony, then we have to be harmony. If we want love, we need to be love. If we want peace, we need to be peace. Lately, to be honest, I have gone through a mini phase of not even wanting to be out in the public. I’m an empath. I will suck in and absorb the anger, moods, depression, and conflict. So, for awhile, I decided to be love right where I am and process my own frustration before I take it out to the rest of the world. It’s hard. We are human. We get upset. We also have a choice though. We can turn that upset feeling into something new and loving if we only choose to be an ambassador instead of a conflict creator.  I sure wish more would learn this lesson.

Can I have a little mini rant? Just for a moment? STOP CHOOSING SIDES YOU ARE ON THE SAME SIDE! Always. Like it or not, we are in this together. All of us. Can we even wrap our heads around this reality? Or even better, can we wrap our hearts around it?

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry

 

Trust, and the Truth Will Reveal Itself

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As I see it, there are two kinds of truth. There is truth with a capital “T” meaning higher or divine truth. Then there is truth as in the opposite of a lie. The statement in my title is about truth with a small “t” or the opposite of a lie. Lying, deception, setting up things as if they are truth, all seem to be a harsh part of human reality. But who are we kidding here? Nothing is ever gone unseen, especially by what or Who is unseen.

I believe it was Thomas in the Bible who was told by Jesus, “Blessed is he who has not seen and yet still believes.” Jesus was talking about mystical things or divine Truth. Yet, His statement is still as profound about the opposite of a lie. Sometimes we see things and think we know what is true. Sometimes we don’t see things, and yet, there is a gut hunch as to what is true or not. Gut hunches are interesting. Not many know or understand that we are spoken to through our gut, or stomach. In fact, the stomach has neurotransmitters just like our brains do.

I love gut instinct or intuition because it gives me a hunch to go and investigate more. Over the years I have come to trust that intuition and the investigation together. When a lie presents itself I am reminded of what Naomi spoke to Ruth in the Book of Ruth in the Bible. She said, “Wait, my daughter, until you find out what happens.” What she meant was, if we wait on the truth it will reveal itself. There is a real reason for this. It’s because the truth is stronger than a lie. Jesus proved this to us when He was questioned concerning his actions and His identity before He went to the cross. Jesus said nothing. He kept silent. One reason, is the truth needs no defense. The other, is He knew the truth would reveal itself eventually.

You see, nothing, and I mean NOTHING, gets past God. Eventually we all know what is a lie and what is the truth. I like to think I have learned from the best of the best. When I question a situation of any kind I like to go silent. Or if my honest actions are questioned in any way, I also like to go silent.

This happened to me at one time in a work environment. I was brought before my higher management because my immediate manager was upset that I had to leave my desk and run to the restroom quite a bit. I also had to eat at my desk, which was piled with work every single day. You see, I was pregnant and in the earlier stages. My manager also had a knack for piling more work on me than I really should have. She was filing her nails and making personal phone calls on the job. She sat right behind me. I had already had a miscarriage from the stress she caused me, among other things. So, there I was, before the elite, just like Jesus was. I was being accused of doing things contrary to my job description. I guess being pregnant really was not so acceptable in the workplace back in those days. Laws have been created to protect pregnant women and their jobs.

I was always a good employee. I never complained and even worked at home when I had more than I could bear at work. I put in more hours than anyone I had knowledge of, and yet there I was, on “trial” for having to “pee” more often? Sounds crazy even now. Yet it was serious. I was at risk of losing my job over my pregnant state and new needs in order to function. I did defend myself. I told the truth about my manager right in front of her and the vice presidents of the place I worked, but it did no good. What did I do? I stopped talking and I went silent. I backed out of the office and out of their lives.

In about 3 months I received a phone call. The accusing manager was fired because they began to watch her and discovered all I had stated about her was the truth. I was not offered my job back, nor did I want it. What I did receive was higher than anything money could have bought. I learned the lesson Jesus and Naomi gave. “Trust, and the truth will reveal itself. ” 

As I write this, I am trusting. Aside from this message, I am being silent in a situation. Honestly, I do not understand people at the moment. Maybe it’s because I really don’t understand that so many don’t even realize just WHO is watching them. Maybe some have become hard in their hearts. Maybe some have just plain not cared about anyone but themselves. All could be possible. Still, I believe in the ability for humans to have compassion. Still, I believe in the truth, both the opposite of a lie and the higher Truth.

Situations can come and go, but honesty, integrity, love, and truth are forever. The lessons we learn from the moments we live are more valuable than anything anyone could ever say about us or accuse us of. Oh people will always lie. We lie to ourselves every day of our lives. It’s the purposeful deceit and lies that I have a hard time understanding.

There is another account concerning Jesus in the Bible that I have always loved. There will be a day when we shall see Him face to face, and in an instant we shall be like Him. In the face of the most influential being in all of history, nothing, and I mean, nothing, can ever be hidden. All is revealed. Just like that moment we stand in the face of the higher Truth. Whether we think so or not, ALL is revealed right at this moment. We were created with God inside of our DNA. He is inside of us. How could He not know the truth about us?

Silent from here,

Dr Rev Jenine Marie Howry, PhD

A Lesson from the Cross We Don’t Always Think About

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Easter weekend always brings a sense of spring, good weather, celebration, family, and food. Alright, these days sometimes the weather is not all the greatest around. But Easter brings up thoughts of chocolate, hard boiled and dyed eggs, leg of lamb and family gatherings.

In the Christian church the focus is on Jesus, the cross, His sacrifice, His rising, and His love. In a time of celebration, the church has been lifting up Jesus every year for centuries for His acceptance of an experience that has gone down in history as one of the most profound acts of sacrificial love ever known to humankind.

I have been so contemplative recently, as I meditated on the cross and what Jesus endured that day on Calvary’s mountain. I let my mind wander to the scene in the garden when Jesus prayed, sweat and cried, with blood, and anguish. He knew He was going to be crucified. Did He want this? Who would? We know He did not in his words, “Father please take this cup from me.” Following those words were the bravest surrender that humankind has ever known. He said, “but if it be Your will Father…”

This whole scene brought me to the point of this message. Jesus was completely willing to move head on right into one of the most graphic death scenes one could ever imagine. His problem loomed before Him. His choices were completely His to make. He could have called upon the angels and He could have been saved from the fate that awaited Him. Instead, He chose to not side-step the issue, but to face it, embrace the lesson, the experience, and the outcome. With trust and faith, Jesus carried the cross He would soon die upon down a road that most would never have chosen to take. No one saved Him from this fate, not even Himself. Beaten down and torn from whipping and lashing, He still moved forward and faced what He had prayed to not have to do.

My point? As humans, it seems like most of us would do anything to avoid pain. Usually we turn to something that comforts us; a habit or diversion from the issue. We turn to food, money, shopping, drugs, alcohol, sex, and the list goes on. We like to do anything that will take the sting out of what we see ahead of us. Instead of facing it head on, we seek to dull our senses, take on the wound, and forsake the healing or “rising”. We forget that pain is a part of life. We forget the lesson from the cross that pain comes before the rising and there is no shortcut, and nothing that can dull our senses enough to change this truth.

How many of us can think back and know for sure had we faced our issues head on without trying to divert from the problem, we would have come through with healing to our hearts and the rising would have come afterward? The honest truth is the only way to our personal rising is to face every problem, every pain, and every situation, head on with dignity. Our words should be, “If it be Your will Father…”  The reality is without facing and walking through the painful part, there is no healing. We want to not “feel”. Since when did feeling become so hard? It’s not pleasant for sure, but the rewards are great.

I thought about the death of my own son. My mind went back in time to the days, nights, and lonely moments in my own garden of anguish. For me, there was no sudden healing, no escape, no shortcut. I did not deaden my pain with alcohol, drugs, food, or anything else. Honestly, there would be nothing that could help me or make me feel any better. There was no side stepping the pain. It just “was”, and sometimes still “is”. When others want to know how I survived the loss of my 20 year old son, my answer always has to be, “I faced it head on with God and God alone”. It was the only way I knew I could survive with some form of wholeness left in tact.

As I continued to meditate this week, I thought of Mary, the mother of Jesus. In days gone by, I wondered how she survived watching her son die. Now I know. She was right there, front and center. She faced the pain head on and when it was over, she privately processed the pain. There was no side stepping, and no numbing the feeling or senses. Only she could have been chosen for the part she played in the most dramatic death scene one could imagine. She survived afterward, and so did I. Was life the same? Of course not, it had dramatically changed forever.

The lesson is there, in the message of the cross. Facing our greatest fears and greatest pain with dignity, faith, and determination is the only way to heal from anything. There is no side stepping this truth. The outcome might not be known to us. We have to take the steps down the road, just as Jesus did toward Calvary. We have to carry our load, but ironically it’s the only way our load can ever be taken from us or off of us. The burden is lighter when we understand there is a reason. The task is endurable when we remember the pain always has to be endured before we rise. No exception. Its truth.

Loving you from here,

Dr. Rev Jenine Marie Howry