Characteristics of Love: Love is Not Self-Seeking

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Not being self seeking can be confusing at first. On one hand we can not give of anything until we have it within ourselves. Being self assured, self giving, and providing self care are all good things. We do need to seek our healing, our inner light, and to seek out what is best in our lives. We give out of the overflow of what we have and who we are. We also self seek when we seek God to an extent. We seek to lose fear, define our lives, search out our purpose and expand our horizons. These are all great things and we should all do them!

I believe what the author is saying here is that love does not behave selfishly with an attitude of entitlement over the needs of others. It’s very different to be self loving from being selfish and self centered in an arrogant way. Arrogance is a form of pride that lords itself over others. The type of self seeking that love is not is the kind that says, “I deserve more than you because I am better than you are.” True love never sees anyone that way, but sees us all as equal even when we don’t all behave on the playground.

We might have different places we fill in business, in life, or in family, but we are all equal in God’s sight. To self seek is to seek without God, from ego and not through Spirit. God’s Spirit is Holy and there is nothing prideful or arrogant within the love that is held in God’s Holiness. Self seeking is also a state of division. It states that a person feels they are higher or above all others and therefore deserve preference over others. It denies the Oneness that Jesus prayed to “the Father” about.

When we are looking to embody true God-love we do not seek preference over others but see one another as equal. We understand that we are not completely whole without one another. Everyone is in a state of “becoming”, so not everyone will be on the same spiritual path as another. Jesus did not come to the earth to just visit so He could establish a set of people who would have it all and others would not. Truth says Jesus came for the whole world, to set people free, to show the way, to relieve us all of condemnation, to pour out grace, to teach healing, and point the way toward eternity. Jesus laid down His life for EVERY human being ever created and came to this planet. That means people who were before, who were then, and who were to be. Literally EVERYONE. Not just those who believe as He does but even those who do not believe at all. Jesus was and is the supreme example of love if we ever saw one. He displayed a love that was never self seeking; a love that laid itself down for those who needed it more.

Do you want to embody this kind of love? Its hard when our human side always will compete to interfere. I believe this comes from not being healed from past trauma. We only act and react poorly from our soul scars. When we are healed and clean from those things then God within us can become bigger and more profoundly present. Remember Peter in the bible? People were healed just walking into Peter’s shadow. Peter did not receive any special preference from God or special grace. Jesus said we all could do greater things than even He had. When He said, “all” he meant everyone. Only pure love and faith could be that profound as to heal others with just being present. Isn’t that the express image of God’s love?

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry

 

Characteristics of Love: Love Does Not Delight in Evil but Rejoices With the Truth

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If you have been following along with my blog posts lately you might have discovered my “love” series is taken from the attributes of love described in the bible in the book of 1 Corinthians chapter 13. Isn’t it nice that we have a guideline? I kind of skipped to this one because it stood out for me today as something we all should pay attention to in this world. We pretty much have a mixed bag of nuts here on earth, and I say that respectfully! What I mean, is there is a huge combination between evil and truth. Maybe it just seems that way because technology allows us to know more than we used to. Or evil seems to be getting more prevalent. A lot of the minor negative issues in our world today have more to do with impatience and lies. Then there are the real evil issues like bombings, murders and war.

What I am going to address are inner characteristics that have to do with God’s love and what it means to embody it. As you might have discovered by now, especially if you have been reading my posts, it is a powerful thing to carry. God’s love is so powerful, I believe it heals. I’m sure the purest of love was in Jesus as He walked this earth and healed so many. Someone who does not delight in evil is someone who always wants the best for themselves and others. This means even our perceived enemies or those who have done us wrong. Embodying real love and truth means we always want the best for people no matter what. As you might perceive, this takes humility and forgiveness. Again, as I always emphasize, neither of these means we tolerate bad behavior. It just means their behavior does not cause us to want them to be harmed in any way. We might feel that way in the beginning but real love will act as a covering.

In the story of Adam and Eve, God covered their “nakedness” in the garden after they disobeyed Him and lied about it. God saw through this because the Spirit of God is all knowing. Their nakedness symbolizes this exposure. Yet, God is pure love and can not hate. Within His forgiveness He covered them. In the story it was a literal covering of their body, but symbolically it is a protection from harm and an example of true God-love.  They received discipline. True love always disciplines as well. We can not think we will do harm and then expect to not have it come back upon us, but God’s grace always protects and covers us when we go to the temple of humility and truth. Grace and forgiveness are powerful healers but they are always balanced with discipline and consequences. This is a part of our God created universe of law and balance.

When the truth wins out, we are walking in divine love and honesty. This means being honest with ourselves as much as with others. Actually, we have to be honest with ourselves first before we can be honest with others. Either way, we have God in our temple inside and everything is exposed anyway. Often, like Adam and Eve, we trick ourselves into believing if no one knows or finds out then a lie does not exist or we will escape the full discipline for our hidden actions. Not true. How can we hide anything from God who lives in us? There is a Scripture in the bible that says, “be sure your sin will find you out.”  This means you will be exposed by the pure standard that is set up by the love of God. It is not that God wants you to “be in trouble” but to expose you so you will be disciplined, humbled, and covered. God wants healing and pure love and truth. True love always rejoices when the truth wins out.

It might not seem fair to not be able to hide in our mistakes and lies but actually the most loving thing in the world is to be exposed. How can we ever learn the power of true love if there is no discipline for our actions. So we can therefore rejoice when the truth wins out! Whether is it for ourselves or others, to see discipline within the truth is to see true love in action. It is a powerful cleansing and the beginning of walking in more of the Light of Life. A lie will bring spiritual death. The truth will bring life. Jesus was a huge advocate of the truth. As God has explained, it sets us free. This is the same whether it is truth, the opposite of a lie, or divine higher truth about our spiritual existence. A lie will fragment us but the truth will make us whole. A lie separates us, but the truth will delight in our unity.

So, you see, to not delight in evil on any level actually heals. We should desire evil to be exposed and to expose it when we are able. When we do this we are acting in true love. The Light always wants to shine to expose darkness. In that way there is more Light and more truth.

I remember when I was a child I lied to my mother about a very insignificant thing. Boy was she angry! I wondered why she got upset over something so small. I even wondered why I lied about something so small. Anyway, I was banished from my favorite television program and sent to my room with the door closed. She never came in to check on me even when she heard me crying. That was a very dark night for me as a little girl but very significant. I had to face my lie. Yes, I had tried to cover it up first, but it was exposed, and very quickly. I was not very happy about that at the moment but I had to face the consequences of my actions. It might seem very insignificant considering the issues we face in this world today but the lesson is the same. We can not hide from the light of truth. It always seeks out to expose us, teach us, humble us, heal us, and grow us up. I told my mother the truth after that, even when it was hard. It often was hard, but I found she was easier on me when I was honest than when I thought I got away with something.

I know it might seem like a childish lesson but in all honesty, had she not exposed it, I might have grown to be a less honest person. We bonded closer after that. The truth always wins out, wants the best for all of us, and is the highest form of love there is. It’s God love and the lesson I learned helped me to also expose evil and lies much easier and stronger since I understand it’s the right thing to do. It’s a loving thing to do. Sometimes it makes people very angry but exposure is still a very loving thing to do.

So, please, understand to not delight in evil. Don’t wish harm on anyone no matter what they have done. Expose the lies you know of, especially if they are your own, and allow the truth to win out. That way we can all rejoice in the truth whether it is human truth or higher spiritual truth. Exposure and discipline will give us both of them.

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry