Honoring Others Decisions and Choices

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If you think this post is going to be about acceptance and boundaries, you are right! Both acceptance and boundaries go together with decisions and choices of others. They also apply to ourselves as well. As I write this, I have to say, as a mother it has been a hard lesson. I spent so many years of my life caring for my children it has been hard to get out of that mode. Once children become adults they have their own choices to make, create their own mistakes to learn from, and lead their own lives. Along with this comes boundaries regarding our children’s choices and lives. Advice is good, interfering not good and would have not a good ending.

Children who have grown also have the responsibility of their own autonomy; meaning they take responsibility of their own lives and the pitfalls of the bigger mistakes. It’s part of adulting and part of learning from mistakes. Within their mistakes there is no place for blame of others. Their lives become their own. Honoring their lives is our responsibility, with love, and with compassion even if we don’t understand.

Honoring decisions is a lesson with all people on earth. This includes choices as to whether we are vaccinated or not, as to what we choose to eat, what our vocation choice is and who we voted for. Yes, I just went there! We don’t choose who has a relationship with whom and we should not attempt to choose an individual’s relationship with themselves and the decisions they make. In the Bible the Apostle Paul supported the right to allow others their own journey. He instructed if we are to go to someone’s home for dinner and they choose to eat meat then honor their choice. For spirituality is not about whether we eat meat or not, but what we choose spiritually and how we treat one another. Let ‘s put it in todays terms. If I go on a Keto diet it basically is no one else’s business what I eat or don’t eat. No one can choose my husband and no one can choose who I vote for in any election. If I live a life of solitude for serenity then leave me in peace. If I choose a time to be social then respect my values and beliefs as I would yours.

Let me also put this universally and from God’s perspective. When any one of us refuses to embrace the life choices of another, we refuse also ourselves. We disrespect ourselves when we impose our views on others and we disrespect our oneness. We can advise and teach, not impose our values and ideas on others. We can have a conversation but that conversation should include grace and love, otherwise we should be ready to face reaping what we sow. Yes, I mean Karma in not such a good way. If we lack acceptance and respect or honor, we will receive the same back and many times over. It is our responsibility to agree to disagree with grace, style, and honor.

Even writing this I know some can go, “but what about this, or that?” What about it? Let me ask you this, “Is it your responsibility to rule the world, and if so, who gave you that job?” Part of diversity is accepting our diverse parts in society. Yes, you heard me, accept and also honor. You might not agree and that is alright. That means not pushing your agenda on others because you are so stuck in your “rightness” that you can not see the disrespect you are creating among your fellow humanity.

Loving you from here,

Dr. Rev. Jenine Marie Howry, Ph.D.

Prosperity Lifestyle Magazine

Life Lessons by Jenine Marie

Do You Lead With Your Heart or Your Head? How Do You Choose?

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Every single day we are all bombarded with decisions. Sometimes we don’t even notice what they are. Our autopilot just kicks in and there we go, making new decisions every moment of every day. Even deeper we are faced with choices and loom up in front of us and then we find ourselves in a place where we need to decide. What you choose might be depending upon what leads you. Or, I should say, what part of you leads you. We all have that inner God part of us, that yearns to lead and then of course there is the rational part of us that always wants to contradict. We know what we might rationally want to choose but our hearts seems to beat to another drum. Ever experience this?

Depending on how you are led, your choices might be very different. Like I said, our hearts and our heads contradict. God choices and ego choices are almost at odds all of the time. So, what do you choose and what guides you? In order to determine what is going on in the choice department I like what I call the meditative or creative pause. This might sound kind of impressive, at least I think it does! Actually, it is just like the moment before creation. There is a pause. Right at the moment before choice we are standing at the doorway of the void. This is where God spoke everything into existence. First there was no form and there was the “void”. It sounds a bit esoteric but the void is simply a place where there is nothing and is just a hiccup before something is created. Before that creation there is a pause, a thought, and a choice.

So, how do you choose? While you are in the void, do you ask yourself what the heart or God decision would be instead of the ego decision? They can be polar opposites and usually are. I wonder how this world would have been created if God would have been filled with ego instead of love-spirit?  I shutter to even think, lol. Thought provoking. I will leave you with your thoughts.

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry, PhD

You Have Relationship Choices

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Everyone, I mean everyone, has baggage in this life. Personally, sometimes I feel like I packed a full load of luggage and just called out “all aboard”! Seriously, we are born into this world as a free and pure soul with nothing written upon it yet. Sometimes I wish we could stay that way but there is no learning in that. The hard thing is our baggage attracts our experiences. In the case of relationships, we more than often attract the learning experiences than the more pleasant or easy ones. Iv’e concluded that life is not meant to be easy, but we don’t have to complicate it more.

What do we do when we have attracted the most difficult experience into our lives? Of course, we all have choices, right? The choice to roll with the punches is always there if learning is what we desire. Or sometimes it is healing we really need to receive. Or we can choose to leave it behind and opt for relationships that give us more ease and comfort. Sometimes they are the image of who we desire to be. What we put out there in our desires with intention and emotion are what we are going to attract.

We can learn from these relationships as well. They don’t all have to be the hard side of Karma. They can be the easier ride. Wouldn’t you rather sit on a nice fluffy cushion than a chair with pins and needles sticking out of it? I hate to be graphic but that is basically the difference in our relationship choices. Sometimes we have to leave the pins and needles behind us and opt for the fluffy cushion. Learning from someone who is amazingly giving and kind can be extremely healing.

If that is the experience you desire than go for it! Kindness is more than someone who is being “nice”. Kindness comes from the depth of someone’s soul, and from someone who cares deeply for us. We can choose this! I think sometimes we believe in our hearts we have no choices but choice is always there like a teacher and a friend.

Do you want the “balm of Gilead”; something soothing to your soul? Or, do you want what feels like a whipping on the cross? Again, its your choice. If you need help in this area of intention, you can set up a counseling or coaching session. Maybe set up a few! What else do you have to lose accept your unhappiness? You can attract more kindness toward you. Be kind. Set your intention for kindness. Meditate on love and kindness. Be grateful.  Be aware! Always look for the opportunities that you are being sent. Don’t miss your chance!

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry, PhD

Spiritual Guidance Counselor/Practical Life Coach

832-484-8306

 

Hard to Press: What Feels Right?

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It’s so frustrating to attempt ironing a garment that refuses to unwrinkle. Usually items that are 100% cotton or even linen are the most difficult. They can be taken to someone to be professionally laundered and still they wrinkle so easy when worn. Usually we try to spray starch the heck out of them just to keep them smooth. Then we have a stiff garment that feels uncomfortable to wear. I stay away from wearing anything that causes me to feel uneasy or stiff. I always talk about living a life in ease. Well, we certainly can’t do that while wearing something stiff, right?

I find it to be the same with life choices. When something becomes so uneasy or is hard to press, the wrinkles just don’t come out no matter what we do. We can try to iron things out but the bottom line is wearing the choice is way too stiff. We can iron the seams, starch life stiff by upping our behavior, or take things to be professionally laundered by calling in the “experts” to smooth things over. Unfortunately, this situation works the same way with our life choices as it does our clothing choices. I’m not saying everything has to be comfortable all of the time. There is no growth in pressing through hard situations. I am saying that some situations will refuse to smooth out no matter what we do. Time to change fabric!

It’s pretty simple. When something is not feeling right, make attempts to change it, or consider leaving it behind you. There is no expert on yourself who is better than YOU. No one can tell you what is right for you, what fits you best, or how to behave to make it better. I am all for ironing out our differences but some wrinkles refuse to iron. We can choose to wear them and be uncomfortable or change fabric. Some things wear better with more acceptance, understanding, and learning how to deal with issues as an ambassador. Some things never wear better and its best to change garments all together.

Whatever your consideration might be, you know yourself better than anyone else does. No one has to teach you what to accept, what feels right, or what feels too uncomfortable to continue to wear. Wearing what no longer feels right just causes wear on our lives. Some things just don’t iron out no matter what we do and therefore we move on to newer and greater things that fit better. Sometimes it just means we have outgrown the garment.

Loving you from here,

Dr Jenine Marie Howry

 

Here is Your Weekly Wisdom! Have You Made Good Choices?

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The night before last I had an amazing dream that put so many things in perspective for me. My dream challenged me to go back and consider all of the choices I have made in life, only leave out any bad things about them. I was only to consider what good came out of them. Then the question was asked, “Was it a good choice?” My answer was always YES! I went from marriage to employment to school, to moves I have made. You name it the dream brought me through it!

What I realized is I made GOOD choices throughout my whole life so far! Every choice brought me to the place I am now. I woke up with a happy joy. So often we focus so much on the bad things that have happened in life that we forget the great things about it! We “think” we have made bad choices because of those difficult situations. If you do this exercise you will realize that all of your choices brought you some great things in life and took you right to where you now are! If you are not happy where you are, think of the good things about it and be grateful. Gratitude is a powerful energy that brings more blessing in your life!

YES! You made good choices! I guarantee you did! Not everything felt good all of the time; but are we here to just feel good or are we here to also learn? Well, today you are learning that you are brilliant! Your choices have been amazing and you are amazing too!

Consider yourself always a rising star and count your blessings for all that you are and all you have come though!

Loving you from here,

Dr. Rev Jenine Marie Howry

Life Coach/Counselor

Metaphysical Practitioner

Ordained Minister

Here is Your Weekly Wisdom!

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Staying away from those who cause chaos in life is not a lack of love, it is a presence of wisdom.

For some reason we are often under the impression that we have to put up with others junk for the sake of love. Love also carries wisdom. There are times we need to walk away from those who disagree, cause turmoil, or don’t carry our same values and morals. This does not mean we don’t love as God would want us to love, it means we are wise enough to recognize that to have them in our lives causes too much unbalance, lack of peace, torment to ourselves, and life becomes unproductive.

Not everyone will agree with one another. The Bible says when “two disagree they can not walk together.” This is not a statement of a lack of love but the presence of wisdom. It’s amazing how many people from the past pop up when they perceive we are doing well. Don’t be fooled. People change, but they don’t dramatically change from who they were before. Love yourself enough to discern who belongs in your inner circle and who does not. Like attracts like. Attract the best for your own life by allowing those who are most like you to draw near and others to fall away. We all are a part of the same humanity. You might have to deal with their sense of rejection, but it’s better than compromising your integrity.

#LoveYourSelf  #HaveWisdom

Loving you from here,

Dr. Rev Jenine Marie Howry

PS BE GOOD TO YOURSELF THIS UPCOMING WEEK!

 

Keep Your Well Clean: Choosing Empowering People!

I’d like to start of this post by asking you an important question. “How many years do you photo 3 (4)have in this life”? I know it’s an unfair question because obviously none of us really know the answer. We can assume we know but we really don’t. Alright, how about a more fair question? “How much of your time on this earth are you willing to waste”? This is a question answered according to personal choice. Most people would answer “none”. Although, we do waste time sometimes here on earth, don’t we? Since this post is about choosing empowering people in our lives, you can see why I asked that question. I had to set the tone for the importance of this subject. None of us really want to waste any precious moments on energy draining associations. Life is important and your success is important, isn’t it?

This is what the Bible says about giving in to the wrong type of people in life:

Proverbs 25:26The Message (MSG)

26 “A good person who gives in to a bad person
    is a muddied spring, a polluted well”.

Now you know why part of my title is about keeping your well clean. This one is real cut and dry, so I am not sure why we tend to choose to stay around those who are not good for us. Our lives are way too important and our time is way too precious to waste around those who do not empower us but bring us downward.

Here are some examples of empowering people. Maybe you can come up with a few of your own as well. Empowering people are those who:

Want the best for you whether you are doing well or not.

Want the best for you whether you are friends or not.

Will edify you to stay strong in the right things and in the right ways.

Will honor what you pursue and will honor your life lessons.

Will keep your struggles confidential when you need a lift or to be strengthened.

Will honor your faith, beliefs, and pursuits, knowing that your life choices are your own.

Will speak the truth to you even when it is hard to hear because they want the best for you.

Will empower you in relationship with them instead of bring your life downward.

Will celebrate your successes with true joy and admiration.

Will energetically support you and not drain you.

Will honestly and thoughtfully pray for your life and for good things to come for you.

Will not undermine you or the relationship connections that are a part of you by spreading gossip, drama, or create havoc in your life.

If you have people in your life who embody these things, do not let them go! If there are those who fall very short of these things, well, you read the proverb. It is really best to let them go. Of course, people can be redeemed. We forgive them. If they truly have changed then there is no reason not to empower them with your forgiving friendship, but if they have not changed, the only thing to do is let them go.  We should trust people, but I want you to be wise as to whom you do choose to trust. Not everyone in this world is worthy of the trust you give to them. Yes, it is very sad, but it is the truth. Since I want to be an empowering person for you, let me offer you this prayer:

Father God, I will not waste time in my life by allowing those into it who disempower me. I only draw toward me those who will be supportive of an empowered life. I know “if two can not agree they can not walk together”, so therefore, I have only those in my life who agree to be supportive of my life’s choices and who value me as a person. In Jesus’ powerful name and heart. amen!

(Dedicated to those who uplift me, empower me, love me, and want the best for me. Thank you for being respectful of my precious time, breath, and life. )

Empoweringly, (Is that a word? LOL )

Pastor Jenine Marie Howry

Jenine Marie Coaching